Of Apples and Oranges: Visible Disabilities and Invisible Struggles

I’ve had this topic rattling around in my brain for a while. It’s been an occasional hum in the back of my mind, and I’m glad to finally shake it out and give it the attention it deserves.

Let’s talk about visible disabilities and invisible struggles. It’s like comparing apples to oranges, and who doesn’t love a good fruit metaphor? Now, I’m not saying we should pit these experiences against each other in a bizarre, fruit-themed gladiatorial combat. No, this is more about understanding, empathy, and inclusivity.

Starting with visible disabilities – and speaking as someone who’s been on this assignment for more than four decades – I can tell you that it’s a bit like having a neon sign flashing above your head. There’s no hiding it; it’s like walking into a room with a spotlight following you, casting long shadows that people can’t help but notice. Even the UPS guy didn’t know how to handle giving me a half case of wine today. (Uhh… do I pick it back up and hand it to him? Do I offer to carry it in?? I guess I’ll just leave it there and awkwardly turn around…)

Then there’s the world of invisible struggles, a term that encompasses everything from non-visible disabilities to mental health challenges to sexuality and gender identification. They’re the proverbial oranges in this scenario. These struggles may not come with a spotlight, but they bring their own set of challenges. Picture it: trying to navigate a world that doesn’t understand why you need certain accommodations or why some days are just harder than others. Or why you don’t really date or bring a significant other to the company summer picnic. All because there’s no neon sign.

So, what’s the take-away from our fruit salad of thoughts? The reality is, whether it’s a visible disability or an invisible struggle, the hurdles are real and significant. However, the common ground is larger than the differences. Regardless of whether the struggle is apparent to an onlooker or hidden behind a stoic face, the need for understanding, accommodation, and empathy remains the same.

In the grand scheme of things, we’re all part of this orchard of life, each with our own unique set of challenges. So, how about we start making it a more accessible orchard for everyone, eh? Whether it’s making physical spaces more accessible for those with visible disabilities, or fostering open conversations and support systems for those dealing with invisible struggles, there’s room for improvement.

Here are a few seeds to plant in your mind orchard:

1. Empathy is universal: It doesn’t matter if the struggle is visible or invisible, empathy should always be our default setting. So, let’s crank up the empathy dial, shall we?
2. Inclusion is key: Inclusion is not a one-size-fits-all concept. It’s about understanding the unique needs of everyone and making sure they’re not just included, but also valued and understood.
3. Education, Education, Education: Knowledge is power, folks. The more we learn about different struggles, the better we can support each other. (And probably ourselves.)
4. Humor is the best medicine: In the face of adversity, a dash of humor can be a lifeline. It makes us human, it breaks down barriers, and it brings us together. So, let’s share a laugh or two along the way.
5. Speak up: Whether you’re living with a visible disability or dealing with an invisible struggle, your voice matters. Share your story, spread awareness, and remember that your experience is valid and important. We’re opening minds here, folks!!

In a world full of apples and oranges, it’s essential to remember that while our struggles may vary in visibility, they’re all part of the same fruit basket of life. We all have our own unique challenges and strengths, and it’s high time we started celebrating those differences instead of letting them divide us.

Remember, whether it’s an apple or an orange, a visible disability or an invisible struggle, they all deserve a place in the sun. So, let’s make sure we’re cultivating an environment where that’s possible, where empathy grows on trees and understanding blossoms at every corner.

At the end of the day, it’s not about comparing struggles or determining which is harder or more deserving of attention. It’s about recognizing that everyone is fighting their own battle, seen or unseen, and treating each other with the kindness, respect, and empathy that we all deserve. Let’s keep pushing towards that future, one where everyone, regardless of their struggles, can feel seen, heard, and valued.

And, as always, remember to laugh along the way. After all, life’s too short for spherical doorknobs and lack of humor.

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If you’ve enjoyed this piece, or if you have your own experiences or thoughts on visible disabilities and invisible struggles that you’d like to share, feel free to reach out to me or leave a comment. As I’ve said before, let’s keep this conversation going.